Steven Wright Quotes
# Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.
# I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house.
# I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.
# I was in the grocery store. I saw a sign that said "pet supplies." So I did. Then I went outside and saw a sign that said "compact cars."
# Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories .
# There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
# How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't live there?
# I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.
# Last week I went to a furniture store to look for a decaffeinated coffee table. They couldn't help me.
# What's another word for "thesaurus"?
# When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask if I'm leaving.
# I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house.
# I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.
# I was in the grocery store. I saw a sign that said "pet supplies." So I did. Then I went outside and saw a sign that said "compact cars."
# Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories .
# There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
# How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't live there?
# I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.
# Last week I went to a furniture store to look for a decaffeinated coffee table. They couldn't help me.
# What's another word for "thesaurus"?
# When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask if I'm leaving.
posted by djjustjohn at
6:58 PM
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